On Mother’s Day

They say to write what you know…and unfortunately, I know a lot about grief.

When I was twenty-five, I lost my mother to a very quick cancer.  I had no time to process the fact that she was sick, let alone dying. I was angry and in denial, and years of therapy later, I probably still am. But she was a very different kind of mom.

My father was an asshole.  Period.  He believed that when a relationship ended, so did his contact with his children. I’m one of five daughters. I have four sisters whom I’ll probably never get to know.

However, my mother made every effort to make up for his absence in my life. In fact, having a single mom was the norm to me, and that’s how we both liked it.  I remember she once told me, “I had to have a daughter to have a best friend…” And that’s stuck with me until this day. She was right. We were so much more than mother and daughter.

She was the one I called every single night just to talk about my day, and I was the one she turned to when my grandmother upset her. We went to the theater together. We traveled together. We shared a love of restaurants and wined and dined every chance we had.

All of that togetherness, however, wasn’t born out of duty or necessity. We both really just enjoyed each other’s company. In me, she fostered a love of cats, theater, travel and New York City. We always had something to talk about.

She certainly wasn’t conventional. She cursed like a sailor, and she taught me some life’s lessons that shaped the independent woman I am today.  She taught me how to believe in myself and to create a life of my own. She taught me how to make my own happiness. In fact, she packed my bags for New York just because she knew it was the only place in the world that truly made me happy.

Throughout my life, she supported any whim I had.  She watched a chubby, clumsy me struggle through dance classes and cheerleading. She attended every single one of my school plays — when I was the star and when I didn’t even get marquis billing. She smiled through my attempts to sing in the children’s choir and to play the piano.

Through all of it, she always returned to what she thought I did best — writing. I admire her to this day for pushing me to write.  My father was the writer.

I remember the day we were cleaning out the basement, and she found one of his old manuscripts.  She didn’t hide it from me.  She showed me.  And she said, “You’re a much better writer. You have talent. He just put words down on a page.” We later burned his manuscript in retribution for his taking her Gene Pitney albums when they broke up.

She could have easily deterred me — guided me toward another passion. But instead, she was my biggest fan and encouraged me to major in journalism. In college,  I spent months writing my final project — a huge essay on Eva Peron that was published in our literary magazine.  I dedicated it to her. And she cried.

I never thought she’d be gone just four years later.

My favorite memories of her were after I moved to New York.  I lived in 300 square-feet with my fifteen-pound cat, and she’d visit.  Sometimes, she’d bring my friends with her. We’d been to the city so often when I was growing up, but she finally had the chance to sample what it was like to live in New York through me.

We built new traditions those last few years, some of which I’ve kept up today. But there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of her. I miss her so much that I can feel the physical pain.  I wonder what she would say about how my life had turned out. I crave the advice she used to give me. And I miss talking to my best friend.

Most of all, though, I miss telling her how much I loved her. I wish I had just five more minutes with her. Hell, I’d settle for sixty seconds.

Chuck, I love you and miss you. Happy Mother’s Day up in Heaven. Go see a show with all of my Tragic Davids in the sky. Mwuahhh!

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Dominant Persuasions Cover

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Here’s a tease of each story below…

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Submission Dance by: Lori King

King

Marley Saltzman has a secret fantasy. She wants to let go, and submit to a Dominant. Intrigued by the BDSM lifestyle, she attends a fetish party to indulge her desires. She had no idea how far out of her element she would be until she came face to face with an experienced Dom. Will this dance end in heartache, or will they both find their darkest fantasies fulfilled?

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Out of Order by: Bella Juarez

Juarez

Journalist Marianna Banta embarks on a search for a faceless drug lord who gunned down her husband, and submissive. When Marianna follows the killer’s bloody trail to Tampa, she finds herself face to face with a man who could derail her quest.

Green Beret MSGT Lars Nielson has returned from the battlefields of the Middle East. Memories of violent, missions have taken up residence in his tortured mind, leaving him broken. He comes to Tampa on a secret quest of his own and finds a challenge. When he takes a job as a bartender at a local BDSM club, he becomes fascinated by the fine art of Shibari, and while tying the intricate knots, his troubled mind finds peace.

When Lars and Marianna meet at her family’s BDSM club, there is an instant attraction they can’t deny. Can Lars coax a lifelong Domme into the coils of his Shibari ropes?

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Surrender Her Inhibitions by: Nicole Morgan

Morgan

Three years ago Sophia Hunt was on the tail end of a bad break up and in a vulnerable and confused state of mind when she crossed paths with the sexy and seductive J.T. Mastrantonio.

Stuck in a rut and no longer satisfied with his successful life, J.T. finds an unfamiliar ache when the scared girl who ran out on him years earlier walks back into his life.

Though time is not their side, Sophia is faced with the realization that her biggest fears and greatest temptations are one in the same. And only J.T. will be the one who can get Sophia to surrender to her inhibitions.

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Make Believe Submissive by: Daisy Philips

Philips

When the Kinky Book Club relocates to the restaurant Maggie owns, she’s fascinated by the D/s lifestyle. When they offer her a chance to visit the club, she talks her fiancé Rick into going, thinking it will be fun for a night.

Rick gave up the lifestyle when he fell in love with a vanilla woman. Maggie may be playing the role of a submissive, but he is not pretending to be a Dom.

Will their visit to Club Hades reawaken a need he thought he’d buried? Can Maggie change from being a make-believe submissive to the real deal?

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Under His Protection by: Doris O’Connor

OConnor

Jacqui Page doesn’t know where to look, when her birthday surprise turns out to be a visit to the local BDSM club. Especially when she spots the one man she’s been secretively lusting after for months. Lukas Markz can’t believe his eyes, when his shy-goody-two-shoes-next door neighbor turns up at his club, dressed as every Dom’s wet dream. The silly girl has no idea what she’s up against. Just as well she’s under his protection. If only he could keep his hands off of her.

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Broken by: Julia Sykes

Sykes

Gwen may bartend at Dark Grove Plantation BDSM club, but she sure as hell doesn’t participate in the kinky acts going on around her. Not anymore. She’s been hurt too many times before.

But everything changes when sexy Dom Damien shows up at Dark Grove and locks his sights on her. He senses her submissive nature and is intrigued when she rebuffs his advances. Determined to take on the challenge, Damien resolves that Gwen will submit to him, no matter what it takes.

Can she resist the unbending Dom who is determined to help her heal? Or will she remain broken?

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The Sub That Got Away by: Amy J. Hawthorn

Hawthorn

Dr. Ember Ross dedicated her life to caring for her patients, always putting her needs last—including her need for submission.

Royce Damron has everything he could want in life. The only thing he lacks? The perfect sub.

When mutual friends use a new BDSM dating site to set them up, a clueless Royce takes things one step further, intending to keep their encounter an anonymous one-night stand. Unaware the woman he’s spent years pining for waits beneath the hood he insisted she wear, will he miss the sub that got away?

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In His Hands by: Raven McAllan

McAllan

In Monsoon season, in Hong Kong, anything can happen… Even so, the last thing Caness Clacher expected was to meet a Dom. The very man who made her want to sink to her knees and say, ‘Yes, Sir’. Unbeknown to her Patrick Lim had waited a long time to claim Caness as his sub. Without electricity and with a monsoon raging, it’s time to explore their desires. Will the elements work in their favor or not… Only time—and a scene—will tell.

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Indulge by: Sherri Hayes

Hayes

Logan Mattson has been dating Lily Adams for a year and he wants to do something special for their anniversary. What better way to celebrate than to take her away for the weekend and indulge in all her kinky desires?

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Submitting To Temptation by: Jan Graham

Graham

Accepting a positions at her brother’s law firm seemed like a great way for Susan to get back on her feet after a nasty divorce. That was until she met junior partner, Blake Daniels, a man who personifies everything Susan ran away from when she left the BDSM scene years ago—Dominance. Blake is a patient man, and it’s a good thing he is because waiting for Susan Dean is driving him to distraction. Susan is a submissive, he’s sure of it, but getting her to admit that fact is harder than he envisaged. When Blake decides it’s time to make his move, Susan has no option but to admit her true nature and submit to his tempting ways.

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Fire and Ice by: Juliet Braddock

Fire and IceI DP Promo 1

What happens when a blizzard immobilizes Manhattan on Valentine’s Day…and a sassy little sub is stuck in her Dungeon with her beloved Dom? With candlelight and a roaring fire to keep them warm on this frigid afternoon, sparks fly between Maxine and Drew as he attempts to cool her down with a bit of tantalizing tenderness…

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Yes, Justin (Expanded Edition) by: Michele Zurlo

Zuro

After fifteen years and two kids, the romance has fled from Trish’s marriage. When a friend introduces her to BDSM, she decides it’s what she wants—to have her body and soul mastered by a man who is completely focused on her. And that’s not her husband, whose life revolves around his career.

Justin isn’t shocked when he finds out his wife is planning to cheat on him. They’ve been drifting apart for years, and he hates it. He’ll carry out her kidnap fantasy, fulfill her desire to be dominated, and force her to confront the reasons she wanted to be there in the first place.

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TEASER REVEAL!

Final Dirty Doms Box

Teaser Reveal for PROFESSOR KNOWS BEST

I am so excited to be a part of the DIRTY DOMS Box set, available for pre-order now (and on shelves June 28).

Ten of your favorite NY Times, USA Today, and Amazon best-selling authors have delved into the world of BDSM Kink. Explore your darkest desires, and deepest secrets under the expert care of a sexy Alpha Dom.

In PROFESSOR KNOWS BEST, Justin Langford is on a mission to teach his star student Sloane Bradford a few lessons in her deepest, dirtiest fantasies. In fact, the last thing he needs is another college girl. Justin wants his very own Baby Girl.

After a miscommunication separates them for a decade, fate reunites the reluctant lovers, and Sloane returns, bruised and slightly broken, to Justin. However, he’s not given up on his pursuit of Sloane—or on his fantasy.

From swing sets to sex shops, Justin challenges Sloane to embrace a life filled with sippy-cups and spankings, all in the name of Daddy’s Little Girl.

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(Capture) Fantasy Surrender by: Lori King

(Sensory Deprivation) Deprived by: Jordan Ashley

(Pet Play) Club Menage: Fifi by: Tara Crescent

 (Impact Play) Sizzle by: McKinlay Thomson

(Medical Play) Electric by: CP Mandara

(Daddy Dom) Professor Knows Best by: Juliet Braddock

(Corporal Punishment) The Beauty and the Badass by: Lucy Felthouse

(Orgasm Control) Secrets & Lies by: Serena Akeroyd

(Fire Play) Kaise by: Jade Belfry

  (Bondage) Binding Her To Him by: TL Reeve

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Dominant Persuasions Cover

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Welcome to My Kinky Corner of the Internet

Thank you so much for stopping by my little spot on the internet. Find out more about my life and work and take a few minutes to browse my library.

My steamy books are known for their emotional depths as well as the touches of humor peppered throughout my stories. Sex, after all, is fun, so why not have a few giggles along the way in your BDSM journey?

I love hearing from readers, so please do get in touch.  And don’t forget to find me on social media as well.

Happy Reading!

xx

JB